First Time Away From Baby – A Necessity For Both

I know what you’re thinking. That I’ve been going on an on about babies on every other post but what about the mommies. This blog is called Mommy Minute after all. So in this post I’m going to talk about mommies and daddies (but mostly mommies, nothing personal) getting some time to themselves without the baby that you’ve been doting on for the last X amount of time.

Worried About Leaving Baby To Do Something For Yourself?

Is the thought you leaving your baby with someone for the first time producing some slight anxiety? Maybe you don’t have to go out for dinner after all, or get your hair done, or go shopping in peace. Put these thoughts aside and go.

 

 

The first time I left my daughter I left her with my mom to go get my hair cut. It was only a couple of hours. I knew that she was in good hands but I kept asking myself if I really needed that haircut. I eventually told myself that yes I actually do need that cut since it had been over 1 year since my last one (please don’t judge me).

 

 

I was trying to talk myself out of it, not because I didn’t trust who I was leaving her with but because what if she needed me while I was gone. What if she started crying and my mom couldn’t get her to stop. Thousands of what if scenarios went through my mind. But I finally stopped listening and went to get it done. And guess what? It was fine. She got to spend time with her grandma which her grandma loved and also got to see what it was like when I wasn’t around.

 

 

Trust me the baby won’t resent you one bit if you go out for dinner for a couple hours.

What If The Baby Cries As You Leave, You Ask?

This could happen depending on the age of the baby. If you do a long goodbye and your baby is old enough to understand that you’re leaving the baby will probably cry. That’s why you can’t to a long, sad goodbye, if you say goodbye at all make it quick and be gone. I snuck away as my baby was playing and it took her a while to notice I was even gone. This approach could also work for you.

 

 

I have also been babysitting and babies/toddlers would cry a little when the parents would leave but then you distract them with a toy and all is well again.

Your Baby Gets Used To Being With Someone Else

After a few times of leaving your baby to have some you time the baby gets used to and might even enjoy being cared of or by someone other than you. Why don’t I shove that knife into your heart a little more, you say? It’s not a bad thing (the baby getting used to being with someone else. Not the knife in your heart).

 

 

I hate to break it to you but there will come a time when you won’t be able to spend every waking moment with the baby. Wouldn’t it be nice if when this time comes they are used to being around other people? Now I seriously need to practice what I preach with this one. I’ll admit I have not left my baby in anyone else’s care enough.

Gives Mom Time To Relax

Whether you want to go out for dinner with your significant other or take a nice leisurely bubble bath in peace it is good to have some time to yourself every now and again. It lets you re-charge your batteries and maybe have an adult conversation. Maybe a couples dinner where you can re-connect and talk to each other without the other little voice chiming in.

 

 

Whatever it is its important that you get a little break and enjoy yourself doing what you want to do.

There Are Other People Who Will Gladly Babysit

I’m sure your parents, in-laws, friends and other family members that are chomping at the bit to be able to have some time with the little one all to themselves. You just have to take advantage of the opportunity. The baby will see that you come back and every time you leave and come back the easier it gets.

 

 

How was it the first time you left your little one? I would love to know in the comments below.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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10 thoughts on “First Time Away From Baby – A Necessity For Both

  1. I was a very naughty baby. My mother says so 🙂

    I know that it’s not easy for mothers to take care of babies, but that’s why we men are here to help 🙂

    Anyway, great post! 🙂

  2. Hi Erin.
    Although I have never had to leave a newborn child, having no children of my own, I have been a foster carer and can understand the anxiety you talk of. When I had to leave my foster children with a new babysitter for the first time, I had to keep checking my phone all night. I somehow felt guilty about leaving them with someone else. Needless to say, it got better with time and I now realise that mother’s need to have a night off every now and then in order to stay sane. Thanks for the helpful article and best of luck to all you new moms out there – it does get better with time and practice!

    1. Yes there is a certain level of anxiety that goes with it but it gets better the more you leave them. It’s amazing that you did fostering. Take care!

  3. The 1st time I left my baby was more heart-wrenching for me than for my little one. I was in tears when i left her. That was my 1st child. I became a veteran mom on my 2nd and 3rd child. Mommies need occasional alone time, and regular dates with the husband. Remember, our kids will grow and will have a life of their own. We have to nurture our relationships with our husbands because in 25 to 30 years, it will be just you and him again.
    Great post! Thank you!
    Gigi

    1. This is true. When I left my daughter all I could think about the whole time was I hope she’s not screaming and crying the whole time. Although she did a bit but she played most of the time. Like you said it’s worse for us than them.

  4. Hi Erin, Loved this post. My Mom was not really happy as a hands on granny. Not that I blame her as she worked full time and was probably tired. The one time she looked after my older son he set fire to her new carpet so I guess I can understand why she wasn’t that keen.
    It is so important for Mommies to have time away from their babies for both their sanity and for the baby to learn to trust another adult. Good socializing time for granny and baby.
    All the best,
    Jill

    1. Lol at the carpet but feel bad for your mom. My parents don’t mind babysitting once in a while but they wouldn’t be too keen on taking care of her all day every day while I’m at work. But like you said I can’t blame them.

  5. Your post put a smile on my face as I remembered when I left my son with my mum for the first time. He was 13 months old and it was the first time I had left his side! Yes, it was really difficult – with all the ‘what if’ scenarios going through my head as you’ve mentioned too. But I knew he was in good hands and eventually you do learn to let go.
    I think it’s important for babies to be in the company of others too whilst mummy not being there – recharge for mummies and hopefully a less-clingy baby!. Thanks for the lovely read.

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